How to make money in this market.

It's really easy:



1) Find companies with declining earnings growth and buy: ANF for example would be a nice example

2) Find companies that are downgraded. The dip is a chance to put new money to work.

3) Buy cult stocks. APPL and AMZN. There is always a greater fool you can sell them to.

4) Buy luxury retail. The fat cats on Wall Street are making free $ and they are spending it at Tiffany's

5) Buy a bank, leverage it to buy a bunch of other banks, and when it fails extort the taxpayer.

6) Buy stocks with high P/E ratios. Valutaions are meaningless. Party like it's 1999 or 2007

7) Avoid stocks in important industries. Refiners are a value trap. The fact that they often trade at less than book is no bargain.

8) Get on Goldman Sach's insider huddle list. You get the info first and can front run. WHo careas about the SEC?

9) Use insider information and buy blatant options days before major announcements. The SEC can't be bothered with investigating crimes. They've got luncheons to attend.

10) Get on Goldman Sach's trading team. They've made money a stunning 99.9 % of the trading days this year. Shamelessly. Now that's doing God's work. While you're there say hllo to Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and any leperchaun's you will see there. And pick that needle out of the haystack there too.



11) Threaten the government that our last vital industry (the financial services industry) will destroy the economy if we don't borrow trillions of dollars from our children and grandchildren to keep the above party going After all, we've got a FIRE to keep going here!!!



12) Do the opposite of what I do. Do not short sell overvalued stocks in overcapacitised industries like retail, finance, or insurance. Fighting free money from the government is a fool's game.

13) Do the opposite of what makes sense. Think a stock is overvalued? So do thousands of other common sense investors. Don't short it. Buy it. It's going higher until it squeezes each and every one of the shorts out.

14) Think a stock is undervalued and has a great future? Don't bother. Without a direct subsidy of cheap money from the government, nobody can get affordable financing. We are in business to reward the inneficient and punish innovation.



15) As unemployment rises...buy more stocks. As long as the fundamentals are bad, remember the Fed's moral hazard is in full play. Bad fundamentals means more borrowed government money on the backs of our children to keep this swell party going in the hopes we all feel rich and start spending money again.



16) Vote Democrat. They're in bed with Wall Street.



17) Vote Republica. They're in bed with Wall Street.



They just change the sheets when the door revolves.



Welcome to America 2009. I idn't make any money this year...did you? Only if you did the opposite of me.